Planning your wedding? It’s probably the most expensive event of your life in Singapore, other than purchasing your nest. Or perhaps your funeral, but you’re not around to fund that event.

I began planning mine early this year, and found myself wishing, and hoping, and praying for a smaller family tree. The older generation really should not have multiplied this much! And we wonder why we’re all scrogged up in tiny high-rise apartments (applicable to the non-millionaire population).

Bridal Showers
Anyone planning on throwing me one?

Beauty
How about I sponsor my face for a trainee’s portfolio?

Gowns
I know you put lotta fabric on them, but really, you could not have spent $3000.00 on that dress!

Entertainment
*clears throat*

Favours Don’t we usually toss these things away? The next wedding favours I receive are for keepers for sure!

Registries
Do these things work in Singapore? Or are we still very asian-fied?

Invitations
What’s Facebook for?!

Wedding Planners
It’s my wedding, not yours!

Transportation
Government urges us to ditch the roads and head for the trains. Not the tracks though.

Reception Sites
I need more friends with huge backyards.

Florists
I come from a clean and green city.

Cakes
Diabetes has been on the rise, let’s practice healthy eating habits.

Caterers
I thought we just covered that?

Photographers
No complaints here, except, any budding photographer need a wedding portfolio?